Will It Waffle?
Start utilizing a typically underutilized appliance.
The ancient Romans get credit for being the first to cook dough between two hot irons. Which makes sense, since until recently it had been a couple thousand years since I made waffles. Not anymore, baby. Over the past month or so, I’ve waged enough batter battles, suffered enough grain explosions and smashed enough sandwiches to expand my kitchen empire into bold new territory.
Now it’s time to share the victories.
I’ll start by anticipating your general questions with the “Rules of Waffling.” Then let’s dive into “Will it waffle?” — a film strip of successes and recipe sketches. Feel free to jump and skip around this story as you like. The idea is to give you all the tools you need to strike out on your own and have some fun.
I’m not the first to embark on this quest. (Google the phrase “Will it waffle?” to reveal a few early explorers.) But I’m hoping this piece inspires you to grease up your neglected waffle iron, grab something languishing in your fridge or pantry, and crush it.
The rules of waffling
In general, dry or dry-ish ingredients, doughs, and batters work better than wet ones.
Choose wisely. Despite all the waffled bacon on TikTok, I proclaim no raw meat, fish, poultry, or eggs. There are pots and pans to cook that stuff. And in general, dry or dry-ish ingredients, doughs, and batters work better than wet ones.
Know your iron. Is it truly non-stick? How many heat settings do you have? Is the top weighted or do you have to press down manually? Can you opt for a crisp exterior? (I set mine to “uniform texture” to control for irons that have no choice of texture settings.) The answers will help you adjust the directions here to your machine and preferences.
Size up as necessary. There are two standard sizes and shapes: The 7" circle (like mine) and the 10" square (with its four square waffles). Both include a 1/2-inch "gutter" around the perimeter for overflow. Based on surface area, the small circle holds 1 to 2 cups of food, while the big square has slightly more than double that capacity, maxing out at 2 1/2 to 3 1/2 cups of "stuff" it can handle comfortably. In both waffle irons, spreading food into a relatively even layer within an inch or 2 from the edges before closing will give you a better result than a pile in the middle. And just because you have a large waffle iron doesn't mean you have to use the whole thing.
Grease while the iron is cold. Safer, less smoky, and easier to get in between those little squares. I almost always use a neutral-tasting vegetable oil refined for moderate to high heat (like sunflower or grapeseed). That said, there are definitely times you'll want the flavor of melted butter or olive oil. Use a silicone brush or small clean towel to smear the fat on both the top and bottom plates. And it's always best to make waffles as soon as the iron is heated so the fat doesn't burn.
Judge doneness with your senses. Take the waffle iron’s beeper as a suggestion. Better signs of doneness are diminishing steam (a signal that moisture has evaporated); a toasty toast rather than a burned toast smell; and easy opening with the slightest effort (if you have to tug, the waffle isn’t ready).
Fear of mess is no excuse for only making waffles every couple thousand years.
Try this cleaning hack. I have to admit, mistakes were made in the process of developing these recipes. So I’m a bit of an expert on cleaning a waffle iron. I discovered a shockingly easy way: After unplugging the machine, pour a little hot tap water into the bottom—just enough to coat it with a thin film. Use a combination of a clean towel, a toothpick, and a Q-tip to wipe out the water and grime without hurting the non-stick finish. Then tip the iron on its side to repeat with the top. (It never seems to get quite as messy.) You might have to repeat this soaking technique a couple times but take it from me, fear of mess is no excuse for only making waffles every couple thousand years.
And now for…the winning waffles
